230 Job applications in 18 months. This is me now…

I won’t lie, it was tough. I can’t say that it was every rejection, more being ignored because the vast majority don’t even reply. But every failed job application was like another chip at me with an axe. My confidence hit an all time low. I lost all self esteem and worth. I questioned everything that had happened over the last 6 or 7 years. I questioned what I stood for. I became frustrated, I questioned the relationships I had built. I thought I had a lot of friends and family, but my phone stopped ringing. I was deserted.

Let’s go back

It was now 7 years ago that our lives got turned upside down. My wife had collapsed and rushed to hospital. She survived but this chronic disease took over her life and at one stage she was offered palliative care. Thanks to two of the best humans I’ve ever met and their teams in London, she survived albeit with life changing implications and ongoing care. Since then, she has had 23 operations/interventions along with CPR that have kept her in this game. Needless to say, that has finally started to take its toll on her mentally.

Over the next few years everything became a battle. Income dried up and we ploughed all our efforts to research Louise’s illness and look for answers as the chronic disease had now stopped her eating solid food. It ended up being two years before she would eat again

·       During the 1st 2 years of this unexplainable illness the semi professional team I managed were relegated. We competed at step 3 with zero budget, recruited from open trials, 5 went onto pro and we were only relegated in the last week of the season when forced to play 4 games in 7 days. I resigned a year later.

·       Added to this, my son who was facing a really exciting career in football had snapped his cruciate, then again during rehab. Then again. Over 5 years he snapped ACL’s 3x and had several operations.

·       With my guard dropped I fell for a corporate scam. We had already sold our home to survive, and this fraud wiped out all our spare money and savings. This theft consumed me. Louise stood in our back garden office, sick, broken, crying, weak and said, “we are finished aren’t we”. Sadly, I answered honestly, yes. I worked out where our stolen goods had gone, I couldn’t get any reply from the police. No police officer ever turned up to our house to investigate it.

·       I was selling everything I owned to survive and a large portion of that went on train tickets to London for Louise’s hospital appointments, surgeries, being an inpatient so was me visiting. A lot of it is a blur and I was going through the motions but, I do recall standing in the snow on a platform in December, visiting Louise and getting a call from the landlord to say we needed to pay more rent, or would be out by Christmas eve. We never didn’t pay our rent, and I would later learn a lot about rogue landlords and bullying in this industry.

·       On top of this I was contacted almost daily by HMRC debt collectors. I never didn’t pay any due tax. But they claimed I had over £20,000 in fines. I appealed with solid evidence, and it went nowhere. These fines accumulated when they were sending them to where I didn’t live. I just didn’t know. I felt it was so unfair. At times I came close to the end. I remember being on the phone to them and being so upset I punched the wall and broke my hand. I would learn that this mistake in address was the fault of my then ‘accountant’. That company took zero accountability, and I learned that my ‘account manager’ was not an accountant. I would go on to pay every single penny of those fines (not unpaid tax) over the next three years on payment plans.

Thankfully I was offered a lifeline. Despite me being in and out of hospital. My old friend Martin Price grabbed my hand when I was drowning. The world was imploding in on me. I went back to work and feel I did a good job and was given awards in the process. I went onto another job which took me to the last two years

Despite the difficult health situation, I did the jobs, and I did it well. Gradually, most of the people I knew in the football industry faded away. But I was acting ok, well at work, despite being worried and stressed as we juggled treatments and now, I had become a carer.  I remember leaving my laptop over a hundred miles away. I left my glasses on the car roof, all sorts of little things like that. We still juggled the private turmoil. We didn’t have holidays, we didn’t go out to restaurants, or anywhere. It was work, health care, bills, sleep, go again.

So, The 230 Job Applications

I had never really ‘applied’ for jobs as such. I was always recruited. So, I didn’t really expect what was to come next. I wanted to go back to work. Initially I was told by a few people that some ‘middle managers’ seen me as a threat. Which surprised me but pragmatically I accepted it. But I realised that things were happening in these recruitment platforms as I wasn’t even getting replies to these jobs. Did they even exist? Were they lined up already and just advertised to tick a box? Am I too old? I realised that each one could take half a day or more to complete. Maybe I’m not as good as I thought I was? In professional football I had spoken up about child welfare concerns and yet I feel pushed out now, and I watched many of the people I had personally helped progress to great jobs. What did I do wrong? In the Tech space I spoke up in support of people and maybe that was it as well? Or do they think my wife being sick somehow prevented me from doing my job, or mean I would need time off work. I think this was a big reason, but they will never admit it of course. I watched people progressing who again, I had helped along the way. I’d certainly seen a lot of ‘jobs for the boys’ in both these industries.

But the bigger two aspects that struck me was that these systems are arduous and flaky with frustrating bugs. But I wondered, is it using AI? Maybe I’m being profiled. How could I not think that? I have now answered literally hundreds of times about my age, ethnicity, religion, sexuality, gender now, what gender was I at birth and disability. If I’m being asked, then surely its being examined and for me, I don’t fit the targeted profile. I think the weirdest and certainly for me the most insulting was, What was your parents/primary carers occupation group when I was 14? It goes on to describe different levels of society. So, what if my dad was a manual worker? On building sites grafting. What has that got to do with me? So I’m being class judged as well? I really started to become dejected with this level of now ‘acceptable’ profiling. How did horrible unacceptable working environments with major issues around discrimination, lead to companies openly discriminating, in order to solve discrimination?

I finished on 230 applications. I resorted to some part-time roles I know I would enjoy, despite knowing it won’t pay the bills. I was offered 4 interviews. I came 2nd in one and they were professional enough to call me. One I turned down because it wasn’t what they described, and I was offered and accepted the other two. I love both jobs.

Following my own advice for resilience. In the gap I was caring for my wife and decided I would do something positive and learn something new in and out of the classroom. I qualified in ACE’S Adverse Childhood Experiences and I learned how to swim properly. I was interviewed and accepted by a charity that prevents young peoples suicide but I have not been able to start because I cannot get a reply from some former colleagues to do a reference.

We decided we want to change our life. We dreamed of owning a coffee and cake shop. We started Wakey Joes. www.wakeyjoes.co.uk I started podcasting and public speaking through McCoolToTalk www.mccooltotalk.com and I am going to really watch with keenness businesses pumping out wellbeing and mental health messages when I consider it to be done for positive PR and Virtue Signalling. I would love to hear from employees in these companies, if they agree, or not. If they say it, and do it, then huge respect. I will also use this platform to talk football, development, academies and non-league. Also returning to football coaching has given me a boost and I will seek a part time return to non-league.

I would love to hear from others who have been on similar journeys with job hunting. Which, btw, I have been an employer. I also got hundreds of CV’s from speculative candidates that you know must not have read the description. But then I didn’t then ask them to spend hours filling in online applications to not reply.

I also started ProfitinPoor www.profitinpoor.co.uk which will never be for making profit for Directors. I want to tackle rogue debt collectors, rogue landlords and others that target and exploit the most desperate people in our society to make huge unfair profit for fat cat directors’ dividends. Do these people think this is innovation, creativity and entrepreneurial? For me its the lowest dirtiest heartless soulless way to make a living. No one should be making money from people in despair, and this is leading to suicide. This industry is thriving as more and more fall into hardship. Remember, when the banks fell into hardship, it was US that bailed them out! These parasites are even deliberately (in my opinion) tripping people up in car parks to slap heavily over inflated fines when some car parks don’t accept cash and have faulty non-working apps. This is unfair for our elderly as well. I’m coming for this industry and going for the head of these snakes.

None of us are entitled to anything. That includes jobs. Employers also have choice, as did I. But I do think if you expect someone to work many hours applying then you should reply. Filter out all those hundreds of ‘speculative’ CV’s before. By replying I also don’t mean the standard issue automated version. I do think people are entitled to be treated fairly, with decency, dignity and without discrimination. Just the best person for the job. Also, trust who you meet, who you spent a long time filtering and getting to know. Who you questioned and tested. Be aware that person could be leaving a very toxic bitter horrible boss, who you are then insisting on getting a reference from, who you never met. This will never make sense to me. Back your instinct! Plus its my opinion that AI and unfair profiling is filtering out and removing your valuable talent. You’ll see.

Now I’m 50, the rejection hasn’t finished me, it has fuelled me, to do it for me and my direct family and to follow my destiny for wellbeing and change something deeply wrong in our society. It’s my purpose and destiny.  Oh, and now I'm going to do what I love and enjoy.

This is me now…

Anthony McCool

Wakey Joes. www.wakeyjoes.co.uk

McCoolToTalk www.mccooltotalk.com

ProfitinPoor www.profitinpoor.co.uk